I want someone to hear this.
I seriously feel like I’m going nuts here.
I recently proposed to my girlfriend.
We’d dated for about five years, starting in college.
I got the okay from her, and we were on the way to a happy marriage.
But, since I couldn’t yet get the money and we were unsure when to have the wedding, we decided to just register our marriage first.
So I got the marriage forms, filled out the necessary bits, and sent them to her.
But in the blank for her name, she wrote a name which I had never seen before.
I Proposed To My Girlfriend, But She’d Been Replaced
星尘 -《蝴蝶旅客》 by 小野道 赭莓奶 et al.
It wasn’t that I had been dating her all this time without knowing her real name.
I typically referred to her by a nickname, sure.
But we had been in the same class in college, and we had laughed seeing our names together on the roster.
I honestly didn’t know what to think.
But those were the facts.
I recognized my girlfriend’s name as being “Hanako Satoh.”
But she wrote something completely different; we’ll say “Elizabeth Ijuin.”
It seemed like a rather obnoxious name, really.
Of course, I asked her about it.
“Huh? What’s that name?”
“What? My name?”
“Isn’t your name Hanako Satoh?”
“What’re you saying?”
That’s the exchange we had.
Do you have her as Hanako Satoh in your phonebook?
^ She’s on my phone under her nickname.
Feeling I must have been making a ridiculous mistake this whole time, I backed off for the moment.
I came to doubt my own mind somewhat.
Deciding to take a look back at my memories, I found some old photographs.
They were pictures of me and my girlfriend together.
But the girl in the photos was not the girl I had been talking to.
However, it was the girl in the photos who I couldn’t recall.
In my memory, I had been dating the girl calling herself “Elizabeth Ijuin” for five years.
Hanako Satoh had vanished into thin air.
I felt like I was going to throw up.
You still want to get married?
^^^ Oh god. Would that be wise?
Maybe show the pictures to Elizabeth?
She just took off her makeup, I bet.
^^ That doesn’t explain her name changing!
Did you have an accident or something?
Sounds like memory loss, or dissociation…
^ No, I’ve never hit my head or anything.
Had my foot broken by a bike, sure.
Does the nickname stem from “Elizabeth” or “Hanako”?
^^^ She had a stage name of sorts for a rakugo club.
I called her a variation on that.
Maybe she just wrote some other name she has?
^^ I don’t think she’d write a nickname on a marriage form…
Think about it, it’d be really obvious if her face changed.
I can’t say anything but that there’s something wrong with you.
Tell a friend about the situation.
^ I suppose… I’ll try getting in touch with a friend from college.
How long ago were these photos from?
It’d help to figure out when the switch occurred…
The photos were taken during our third year of college, so four years ago.
Oh, but I knew there was a girl named Hanako Satoh since my first year.
Have you always stayed close?
Never gone long-distance at any point?
No occasions that I think are worth mentioning…
The longest we’ve gone without seeing each other at all is about two weeks.
That was for a family trip.
In Korea, they use aliases on marriage forms, trials, all kinds of official stuff.
Because they really do have two names.
^^^ Seriously? I mean… Well, I guess I’ve never asked if she’s Korean…
I guess I could check…
Tell us everything since the time you met.
^^ Nothing really special’s happened since we met…
She did rakugo in a club and I came to listen, and I thought it was neat.
Since we were in the same class, we became friends and started dating.
Which girl is in the most recent photo you have?
Hanako, or Elizabeth?
^ The only other recent photos I have are phone photos.
I upgraded my phone about a year ago, and all the pictures on it are of Elizabeth.
But her name and face are different? You can’t explain that…
Indeed… I can’t.
I’m going nuts here…
Gonna go for a smoke.
I’m getting confused…
Is it that you were dating Hanako Satoh, but she was replaced by Elizabeth?
Or that you were dating Elizabeth, but she was replaced by Hanako Satoh?
^^^^ I thought she was Hanako Satoh, but she became Elizabeth.
What do you call Hanako by, OP?
Even if it was a nickname, if she got replaced, wouldn’t she find it odd?
^^^ I’m afraid to to tell the details, sorry…
If the nickname came from a stage name, then she could’ve become Elizabeth then.
It must have been Elizabeth from the start.
^^ Maybe… But the pictures were from when we were dating…
So her face is completely different?
^ I think they look very different. I don’t think makeup could be it…
But then again, I don’t know anything about makeup.
Why don’t you ask her directly?
I’ve been in disarray after yesterday.
I’ll ask her again later.
Maybe it’s OP’s personality that’s been replaced…
^^^ I am doubting myself a little…
People can get their names changed, y’know.
Maybe she killed somebody?
^^ Can you do that? Don’t you need to go through a whole process and such?
Maybe she had a husband but got divorced?
^ But both her names changed…?
“Isn’t your name Hanako Satoh?”
“What’re you saying?”
What happened after this?
Did she show any signs of distrust or being unsettled?
At the time, I was just thinking “Huh? Do I have her real name wrong, since I always call her by her nickname?”
So I didn’t want to probe too deeply.
Of course, my head was filled with question marks, but I just tried to smooth it over.
Because if it were my mistake, I thought she would get angry at me.
Remembering her name wrong would be outrageous.
Maybe you’re in an alternate dimension.
But they were sloppy in falsifying your memories…
^ Always possible.
There’ve been people who feel like they’ve suddenly woken up from a long dream.
^^ Um, that’s freaky, guys…
Did you send the marriage form?
^ Marriage registration is a pain, and I haven’t done it yet due to various hang-ups.
Plus now, I’m a bit scared to…
I keep thinking about this and getting nowhere.
You gotta contact someone you can trust right away.
^^^^ I emailed a friend earlier, but still no reply.
The current girl is someone who’s long stalked OP.
Wanting to marry him at any cost, she talked to a hypnotist.
She took OP to him, he used his hypnotism, and here we are.
^^ Can hypnotists actually do that sort of thing?
Got a reply from my friend.
Incidentally, here’s what I sent:
“Remember [nickname] who I’ve been dating?
Was her real name “Hanako Satoh” or “Elizabeth Ijuin”?
“I think it was something Satoh, yeah. Did you break up?”
I figured it was Hanako Satoh I was dating…
First of all, you gotta tell us any episodes from dating Hanako to now, in chronological order.
Sort things out in your head.
Sounds like you’ve got some serious memory issues.
^^^ I’ll try to remember and post some things.
Which one’s cuter, Hanako Satoh or Elizabeth Ijuin?
^^ I guess if I had to say, the one in the photo is cuter…
But does OP still love this Elizabeth Ijuin?
^ Of course. I’m all set to marry her.
I sent my friend a message:
“Do you know the name “Elizabeth Ijuin”?“
In my first year of college, Hanako Satoh was in the same class as me.
Even at welcoming parties and such, we didn’t really come into contact.
In second year, I saw her at a rakugo performance by one of the clubs.
I thought, “Ah, she’s that girl in my class.”
When she got off the stage, I think I said to her, “I never realized you were in the Ochiken club, Satoh.”
I’m fairly sure I called her “Satoh” then.
I realized I was interested in this girl.
Being a literature major, I asked her to teach me about rakugo and borrowed some books.
On Christmas that year, I confessed to her.
She put on a show for me after doing sexy things in my room, haha…
Got a reply.
“Don’t know her. And “Elizabeth Ijuin”? Hahaha, what kinda name IS that?“
Maybe ask your friend if he knows Hanako Satoh’s number?
If her face is the same, then maybe she uses a different name for official things than she uses normally. Is she a foreigner?
But like I said, her face is totally different.
The Capgras delusion.
Maybe OP’s case is a little different, but doesn’t it sound similar?
I read the article.
It seems different, but similar.
Maybe I really should go to a psychiatrist.
卡普格拉综合症（Capgras delusion, Capgras syndrome）是一种妄想症，患者不能正确识别人物或者对象，认为这些都是冒名顶替的。卡普格拉综合症患者没有正常的情绪反应，认为过去熟悉的人或物是冒名顶替的，仅仅看上去像过去那样。有时候患者认为自己的房子，甚至自己，也是另外一个不真实的对象。患者可能挑剔他的父亲，“我知道你看上去很像我的父亲，但你不是，因为他开车没有这么快”。脸盲症患者可以识别人脸部分，但不能将识别的部分组合起来。卡普格拉综合症可能是脸盲症的另一面，即无法产生正确的情感信号，也就是无意识识别过程受损。
Reply from my friend.
“Her number’s ***-****-****, right?
[Her number from college, but it’s different now, so this is useless info.]
‘Course, she’s your girlfriend, so you’ve spent loads of time together, but I’ve never gotten to talk with ___ once…”
Contact that club she’s in?
I don’t know any members I can contact.
She might know, though.
I’ll meet her tomorrow and ask… Too scared to today…
I called the old number just to be sure.
Indeed, it’s not in use anymore.
Okay, posting some more things I remember.
After going out on Christmas of my second year of college, we went to visit a temple for the new year.
I think I wrote something like “I pray we’ll always be happy together.”
She might have written Hanako Satoh, but I can’t remember for sure.
She gave me chocolates on Valentine’s.
Around this point, our rooms changed around and we ended up together.
In third year, we were in the same seminar.
I remember seeing her on the roster and saying “I’m glad we’re in the same seminar.”
Fairly sure the name there was Hanako Satoh.
What about trips? Never wrote her name when signing in or anything?
^^ Yes, we went on trips. To Kyoto, to Izumo…
And I think she wrote her name while booking hotels.
But I can’t really remember if it was Hanako Satoh.
So basically, you don’t remember anything from college about “Elizabeth” at all?
^ It’s not like I can recall everything perfectly, but I think so.
I don’t remember finding any incidents odd before…
What’d you call Satoh and Ijuin, respectively? Both the same?
^ What did she call me?
Just by my first name.
It’s been that way since college.
It was my last name at first, but then she used my name once we started dating.
I’m almost wishing to be diagnosed with something at this point.
Not being able to explain all this is what’s making me go nuts.
Thanks for the quick reply.
But learn to read! I asked what did YOU call HER!
You called Satoh by her nickname (stage name?), right?
And Ijuin by the same nickname you used for Satoh?
She’s had the same nickname since college.
And I’ve called both Hanako Satoh and Elizabeth that same name.
What’s she doing now?
She’s in her room, I think.
We’re both renting rooms closer to our respective workplaces.
In the same seminar in third year, our members went flower-viewing.
The friend I emailed earlier was one of those members.
I called her by her nickname, so it spread throughout the group.
In summer, we went to the beach. And we went boating in the mountains.
By this point, I think I stopped using her real name altogether…
But when attending the seminar, the professor definitely called her name.
And I don’t remember thinking anything was odd then…
Also, we went to Kyoto together this summer.
Does it feel like the memories you had thought were spent with Satoh are now memories with Elizabeth (upon seeing the name Elizabeth), and you’re wondering who Satoh is?
Or is it just the name Elizabeth compared against it being Satoh in your memories that’s confusing?
In my memory, the girl I’ve been dating now is the one I’ve dated since college.
But her name in college was Satoh, and now it’s Elizabeth.
And in photographs from my college days, I’m with a girl I don’t recognize.
There’s the photo taken in Kyoto, and one at Izumo Temple from autumn of this year, and it’s the same girl in both.
I don’t take many pictures, so that’s all I have.
You say you don’t recognize her, but don’t you know both Satoh and Elizabeth’s faces?
You know Elizabeth’s current face, but don’t recognize the old Satoh?
I don’t know whether it’s Satoh or Elizabeth, but I don’t remember the face of the girl in the photos.
But the one I went on the trip with was definitely my girlfriend.
This is wearing me out.
I’ll check on various things tomorrow.
Though talking about it here has gotten me more nervous.
And that’s considering I felt like throwing up before starting the thread…
Maybe nothing’s been resolved, but you’ve been helpful nonetheless.
Thanks for listening, everyone.
I’ve been waiting for this!
I’ve calmed down some now.
To be honest, I don’t have much to report. Sorry.
I’ve been too busy with work to go to the hospital.
However, I did send a phone photo of the girl I don’t recognize to my friend.
“___? Is this from back in college?”
I emailed Elizabeth:
“How long have we been dating, again?”
“About five years, isn’t it?”
That’s about all I can report.
Not much progress.
I’m a little tired.
I think OP should decide on this himself, but…
A: The girl he’s currently going to marry
B: The problem girl in the photograph
C: The girl he was dating when the photo was taken (The girl OP thinks he’s been dating all along)
A/B/C could be three people or all just one.
They could also be named either Satoh or Elizabeth.
I think coming up with a standard like that could make things easier to read.
It’s not exactly easy for me to divide it up that way…
Because to me, I’ve been dating Hanako Satoh all along, and I don’t know the girl in the photos.
Didn’t you use “___” at some point?
Is that not Hanako Satoh?
___ represents the nickname I called her by.
The point is, you sent a photo of B to your friend, right? What did he call B?
I called her ___ (her nickname) back then, and my friend called her that as well.
Nickname? She has a nickname too?
Her nickname… Oh, fine. I suppose I might as well specify.
Her stage name at the time was “Aigantei Chiwawa.”
Thus, I called her “Chiwa.”
她的艺名是“愛玩亭千輪々（Aigantei Chiwawa）”，所以就用昵称吉娃娃（ちわちゃん）叫她了 。
Did your friend know Chiwa was her nickname? He didn’t think it was her real name?
He was in our seminar, so he should know her real name.
And he remembered her last name as Satoh yesterday.
This really is wearing me out, though, so I ask you to wait until I’m ready to report (including my nerves settling down).
I decided I don’t want to go to the hospital until I’m certain of a few more things.
I’m busy working, so I haven’t met my girlfriend or my friend.
And I’m a little scared of the two of them meeting face to face…
But I’m planning to see my friend tomorrow.
For now, show her the old photographs.
^^^^ I’ll try that.
Introducing your friend and her (Ijuin) would settle everything.
Your friend knows “photo girl = Satoh = Chiwa,” and Ijuin knows herself as “Chiwa,” so you three can talk it out.
^^^ I’ll discuss it with my friend tomorrow.
你的朋友知道“照片上的女孩 = 花子 = 吉娃娃”，伊丽莎白知道“她自己 = 吉娃娃”，所以三个人见一面能解答不少疑惑。
I’m curious about this bike incident where he broke his foot.
Maybe he doesn’t remember, but maybe he fell unconscious?
If so, it might have had an effect on his brain.
^^ I broke my foot right after entering my fourth year.
I don’t think I hit my head.
A lady crashed into me from the side, and my right foot got crushed underneath the bike.
- Might be like that Natsuhiko Kyogoku book with the guy who can’t distinguish faces. (Dunno if that disorder actually exists.)
- Calls her mostly by a nickname, so thinks “Huh? Was that her name?”
- He got the name wrong from the start.
Any combination of that stuff could work…
^ What do you mean by not being able to distinguish faces?
You aren’t poor with faces and names, are you, OP? Even if it’s not bad enough to affect your life.
For now, I’d recommend counseling as soon as possible.
The one thing I want to know is if this is a mental issue. It can happen to anyone, and people can live their whole lives not realizing it.
^ I’m kind of bad at remembering faces, but… not bad enough for anyone to mention it or anything.
I’ve always thought I was just normal.
But if there are people like that… Maybe I’m that way, too?
In fact, I think I have some of the same symptoms as OP.
It’s not as extreme, but I suddenly forgot someone’s name, and even when I looked at an old photo of them, I couldn’t link the face and the name.
To be fair, it doesn’t explain how your friend remembers her as Hanako Satoh… but it could be several things at work.
Try to consider all the possibilities.
Just consider that there are other people with this condition.
Reporting on what happened today.
But I’m still sorting out what happened myself, so it might be hard to understand in places.
Ask me about anything unclear.
Also, I’m a little drunk. So I’m going to ramble on somewhat. Sorry.
I met my friend who I emailed earlier.
We met at a pub and talked while eating.
We haven’t met in about half a year, but we occasionally emailed each other.
First, I showed him a couple photos of the girl I didn’t recognize.
I had already sent them earlier, but I thought it might have been harder to judge from the phone camera.
Friend: “These are the pictures you sent?”
Me: “Yeah. Do you know who’s in them?”
Friend: “You and Chiwa, right?”
Me: “You’re sure?”
Friend: “I don’t get it. What’s this about?”
Me: “Maybe I’m just messed up in the head, but I don’t know who the girl in these pictures is…”
Friend: “What? You serious? Aren’t you dating?”
Friend: “Did you break up?”
Me: “No, nothing like that…”
Friend: “Then what?”
I couldn’t explain it very well, so it kept going on like this.
It might have been the alcohol, too.
But eventually, I explained the whole situation.
He was quiet for a while, drinking his sake.
I wasn’t sure what to say.
Friend: “Well, if you yourself think you’re messed up, wouldn’t it be best to go to the hospital?”
Me: “I’ve considered it, but I wanted to make sure first…”
Friend: “But hear it from me. This girl is definitely Hanako Satoh, and I don’t know any girl named Elizabeth Ijuin.”
Me: “Then I have a request. I want you to meet with Elizabeth.”
Friend: “What? I don’t wanna… Why should I…?”
And here I thought he was a friend.
Or maybe he got replaced, too?
Well, not wanting to get into that kind of nonsense, I just figured going out into society changes a person.
Friend: “Anyway, go to the hospital and get counseling.
I’ll pay the bill here.”
Perhaps you could say he ran away from me. Nuts.
So that brought today to a close.
Hi! I’m Kate, but call me vg, vgperson, or vghime. I’m the popularly-elected Princess of Vocaloid and a prolific translator of Japanese.
This blog is primarily about translated content, but if there’s no source and it doesn’t look like it’s a translation of something, I probably made it myself.
你们好！我是Kate，但是请称呼我vg, vgperson, 或者vghime。我是大家拥戴的Vocaloid公主，也是高产的日文翻译者。