4chan：故事两则（20160531）

引用元：http://www.funnyjunk.com/channel/4chan/Anon+gf/kwziLxj/

　　　　http://www.funnyjunk.com/channel/4chan/He+killed+fitty+men/tkMjLgx/

---

 

 

 

>>685332241 (OP) #

>when I was 18 I met gf

在我18岁那年我认识了我的女朋友

>we got along great

我们相处的很好

>6 months in she hides dinner plans with guy from work

6个月之后，她隐瞒了与一位同事晚餐的计划

>l find out

我发现了

>she cancels making me out to be horrible

她将其取消，这让我感觉很糟糕

>guy gets a new job elsewhere, end of that

那个男后来的另谋高就，之后没有其他状况

>2 years in she goes to university

交往两年后她进了大学

>one night she confesses she kissed some guy whilst drunk on a night out

一天晚上她坦白她在一个出去浪的晚上喝得很醉同时亲了某人

>dumps me when I’m saying “it was just a kiss, you wont do it again”

在我说“这只是一个吻而已，你不会再犯”之后她把我踹了

>2 months later begs me to come back

两周之后她请求复合

>l think with my dick and take her back

我考虑了下生理需求，同她复合了

>a month later she confesses she fucked 2 guys

一个月之后，她坦白她和2个男人有了一腿

>l dump her

我把她甩了

>a month later she begs me to take her back again, says she has grown up

一个月后她求我再给她一次机会，说她已经吸取教训了

>a few months later she starts cutting herself

几个月之后她开始自残

>Later on she starts hitting me if I try to leave

接着如果我尝试逃离，她就会打我

>threatens to kill herself and write a letter claiming I raped her if I break up or stop trying for us

她威胁说如果我同她分手她就会自尽并且留下声称我强暴她的遗书

>l’m stuck in this relationship with nobody to turn to

我被这段感情困住并且无路可逃

>getting punched while I sleep, punched for forgetting something in her food order, anything so she doesn’t cut herself

在我睡觉时会被揍，因为我在点她外卖的时候忘了什么东西，任何东西，所以她不再自残了

>reach 5 years together

就这样过了5年

>”Anon you had better propose soon”

“楼主，你最好尽快求婚”

>l do propose, she cries and screams with joy, shares pics to fb, calls family

我向她求婚，她喜极而泣并且满心欢喜得大喊大叫，她将照片上传到微博并且取名为家

>decides that is the best time to confess that she slept with 8 guys throughout our relationship

她认为这个时候用来坦白自己在与我交往时还和八个男人上床时最好的时机

>l go to toilet and get my phone out

我走进卫生间并且将我的手机留下

>set it to record video

将其设置为录音

>l go back to her

我回到她身边

>”lf you leave, I’ll claim you raped me and then I’ll kill myself, my family will never forgive you”

“如果你离开我就会声称你强暴了我然后自杀，我的家人永远不会原谅你”

>l show her recording phone, she cries

我给她看了正在录音的手机，她哭了

>l leave

我离开了

>Tell her that its up to her how she tells her family

告诉她如何告知她的家人取决于她自己

>its over

我们结束了

>should feel great, but I don’t

我应该感觉很好但是并没有

>she kills herself a month later

她在一个月之后自杀了

>l panic when I see women who look like her

当看见长得像他的女人是会惊慌失措

>l flinch when women try to touch me

当女人想触碰我的时候我会躲闪

>its been 2 years

这种状况已经持续两年了

>l’m just “that guy whose girlfriend killed herself”

我就是一个“那个家伙的的女朋友自尽了”的人

>known to seemingly everyone in my county

变得在我的村里似乎人尽皆知。

 

>2 years ago be 23

2年前我23岁

>Meet girlfriends family for first time

第一次见我女朋友的家人

>Military family

她出生于军人世家

>Brother,father, grandfather >Served in Iraq war, desert storm and WW2

她的哥哥，父亲，祖父分别服役于伊拉克战争，海湾战争以及二次世界大战

>GF tells me they like to give her boyfriends shit so don’t be afraid to act tough otherwise they won’t respect you

女朋友告诉我他们都想给她的男朋友一点颜色瞧瞧所以要尽量表现得强悍一点不然会被他们看不起的

>Go to shake her brothers hand

同她的哥哥握手

>Fucking death grip

真是死亡之握

>My hand feels broken

我的手都好像断了似的

>Go to shake her fathers hand

同她的父亲握手

>Same fucking thing

妈蛋一模一样

>Go to shake her grandfathers hand

和她的祖父握手

>Squeeze as hard as I can

用尽力气挤他的手

>He’s 86

他86岁了

>Hand shatters like graham crackers

他的手碎得好像饼干一样

>GF dumps me a week later out of hatred/embarrassment

女朋友在一周之后充满怨恨/尴尬得甩了我

 

---

最近不敢上街，害怕摩托车

↓喜欢我们的文章请您与朋友分享

------------------------------------看趣闻需要你的帮助，详情------------------------------------